Careless Whispers

When my son flew the nest to go to school in BC last fall, my thoughts wandered back to all the things I used to love to do, long before I started a family. When I lived in London, road biking was something for which I had a real passion. I shudder now when I think back to the tiny winding roads full of pot holes, and the high volume, high speed traffic that I shared the road with. However, it did stand me in good stead for the art of mountain biking on treacherously, narrow trails down the side of a mountains! Enjoying my memories of past adventures, like a 90km ride for charity from London to Brighton through the beautiful English countryside, I set my mind to purchasing myself a good second-hand road bike for this summer. Today I did just that.

Not knowing much about the new technologies (it’s been over 20 years since I owned a road bike) I had to rely on my tried and true guidance system – my body – to lead the way. Well, that and my good friend Liz :). I’m well practiced in knowing when something is right for me – my body feels light, energized and excited. Conversely, when something is not for my highest good, my body feels heavy and constricted. Pretty clear guidance right? Well, it would be if the ego was not involved. The mind can be very slippery when it sees something flashy and shiny!

The day before my purchase, I got very excited about a bike my friend had found on Kijiji. It was top of the line, in excellent condition and the perfect size for me. It was also $500 beyond my budget. I tuned into my body and the answer was a resounding ‘no go.’ Everything constricted when I thought of spending that much money. However, as the day went on, my mind really kicked in. ‘This is such a good deal for such a great bike…you would look so good on it…so what if it is way more than you wanted to spend – treat yourself, you deserve it …you’ll kick yourself if you don’t and nothing else as good comes up…blah, blah, blah.’ Despite the heaviness I felt within, I succumbed to the relentless barrage of reasons why I should buy it and called the owner. He told me that someone was coming that evening to look at it, but I was second in line if it didn’t work out. When I put the phone down I tuned into my body again, instead of being anxious or annoyed that I hadn’t called earlier, I felt remarkably calm. Duly noted.

It turned out that the bike sold to the first person, and yet still I felt calm and my body was light. While it was a wonderful bike, I was clearly relieved to have not spent so much money – that was my truth – not the stories my mind was telling me. When I went online this morning, there she was, the bike for me – $650 cheaper, a little older, but in excellent nick. My body was positively vibrating with excitement when I pitched up at the owner’s house to buy it. The moral of the story is plain to see – learn to tune into you’re your body and listen to its wisdom. No matter how seductive or sweet the whispers of the ego mind may be, have patience, for your body knows best.

If you would like to practice the art of tuning into your body’s wisdom, mindfulness meditation is a wonderful way to build the muscle.